corruption
11-04-2004, 12:07 PM
* You don't get "road rage," you start driving "on tilt."
* You can stack $10.00 worth of quarters into 8 perfect stacks of 5 quarters each in three seconds flat.
* You go out to a restaurant and tip the waitress the second she brings your food.
* You use the phrase "bad beat" when lending a sympathetic ear to a friend.
* You have nightmares about your cards changing during the hand.
* You have dreams about poker where you bet food instead of chips.
* You are having such a bad day at hold 'em that you decide to take a break... and play Omaha.
* The guy on TV didn't win the lottery, he had the "nut ticket".
* You drive 35 miles with a bad battery and know you'll need a jump when you leave, but you pawn your jumper cables for a buy-in.
* Your kids are named Check and Raise.
* You have 12 games on your computer, solitaire, minesweeper, and 10 poker games.
* Your bathroom library consists of Card Player and Poker Digest.
* The only reason you go to your in-law's for Thanksgiving is for the nickel, dime, quarter game after dinner.
* You tip your wife $.50 when she brings you a beer while watching football on tv.
* You intentionally start a fight with your spouse so you can righteously storm out of the house saying "I don't have to take this!" and head straight to the poker game.
* It's been more than 24 hours since the first time you told yourself "Just one more round and then I'll get some sleep."
* Your two ATM cards and five credit cards have all reached their maximum cash advance for the day.
* You figure if your family leaves you, that will give you more time and money and you can move up to a bigger limit.
* You get an invite to a new home game and play until 3:30 am. It takes a solid week of begging and promises to your wife to get to go to the second game, and you play until 6:00 am.
* You lose down to two chips and you still can't make yourself get up and go home.
* The only time you play tight is from 11:40 p.m. to 12 so that you won't lose your seat before you can hit the ATM for your next day's withdrawl.
* Your sweetie gets a certain look in her eye and you think it means that she wants to go to the cardroom.
* You fret over whether you should get a medium or large Coke at McDonald's, but laugh at the $3 ATM fee at your local cardroom.
* You play all night, drive home, take a quick shower, go to work, leave work eight hours later and go play five hours of live no-limit hold 'em.
* You have a poker chip in your pocket right now.
* You nearly explode your bladder because, "That next hand might be the one where I get back to even."
* You start classifying people in your life as "tight" or "loose," even if they've never set foot in a poker room.
* You check for new posts on DenverPoker.com more often than you check your e-mail.
* You can stack $10.00 worth of quarters into 8 perfect stacks of 5 quarters each in three seconds flat.
* You go out to a restaurant and tip the waitress the second she brings your food.
* You use the phrase "bad beat" when lending a sympathetic ear to a friend.
* You have nightmares about your cards changing during the hand.
* You have dreams about poker where you bet food instead of chips.
* You are having such a bad day at hold 'em that you decide to take a break... and play Omaha.
* The guy on TV didn't win the lottery, he had the "nut ticket".
* You drive 35 miles with a bad battery and know you'll need a jump when you leave, but you pawn your jumper cables for a buy-in.
* Your kids are named Check and Raise.
* You have 12 games on your computer, solitaire, minesweeper, and 10 poker games.
* Your bathroom library consists of Card Player and Poker Digest.
* The only reason you go to your in-law's for Thanksgiving is for the nickel, dime, quarter game after dinner.
* You tip your wife $.50 when she brings you a beer while watching football on tv.
* You intentionally start a fight with your spouse so you can righteously storm out of the house saying "I don't have to take this!" and head straight to the poker game.
* It's been more than 24 hours since the first time you told yourself "Just one more round and then I'll get some sleep."
* Your two ATM cards and five credit cards have all reached their maximum cash advance for the day.
* You figure if your family leaves you, that will give you more time and money and you can move up to a bigger limit.
* You get an invite to a new home game and play until 3:30 am. It takes a solid week of begging and promises to your wife to get to go to the second game, and you play until 6:00 am.
* You lose down to two chips and you still can't make yourself get up and go home.
* The only time you play tight is from 11:40 p.m. to 12 so that you won't lose your seat before you can hit the ATM for your next day's withdrawl.
* Your sweetie gets a certain look in her eye and you think it means that she wants to go to the cardroom.
* You fret over whether you should get a medium or large Coke at McDonald's, but laugh at the $3 ATM fee at your local cardroom.
* You play all night, drive home, take a quick shower, go to work, leave work eight hours later and go play five hours of live no-limit hold 'em.
* You have a poker chip in your pocket right now.
* You nearly explode your bladder because, "That next hand might be the one where I get back to even."
* You start classifying people in your life as "tight" or "loose," even if they've never set foot in a poker room.
* You check for new posts on DenverPoker.com more often than you check your e-mail.